Change Your Mindset: The Calming Power of “No”

How do you feel about saying no to someone in the business, either colleagues or clients? Do you find that you say yes out of obligation or guilt, or do you just have a hard time saying no and not sure why?

The lack of using that little word “no” can have such a powerful effect on our lives and our emotional energy. It can be the difference between feeling good and in control of our lives, to feeling overwhelmed with a heavy workload and high levels of stress.

Here are three examples of common scenarios:

• Your boss keeps piling projects on your already heavy workload, and you accept without a word
• Your client is demanding more from you than what you agreed upon, and you comply
• Your colleagues are constantly asking for your help on projects outside your department

If you have difficulty communicating to others the response you would like to say, which is “no”, then you could be experiencing a buildup of emotional stress which can cause mistakes, errors in judgment, frustration, anxiety, and eventually lead to severe health issues.

There is a light at the end of this tunnel! There are ways that you can say “no” professionally and politely without guilt, or worry about hurting someone’s feelings or getting anyone upset with you.

Most times, the emotional power you require to say “no” can simply come from referring to your current plans and schedule. These plans and schedules are facts, and no one can fault you for sticking to facts. If you don’t know whether you can take on any more work, from either boss, client, or colleague, then you have the right to decline. This will not only reduce your stress levels, it will also help boost your confidence, plus increase others respect for you and your time; and before long your feelings of worry, anxiety, or stress will diminish.

Here are a few suggestions on how to decline the above scenarios with professionalism and respect:

• I would be fine taking on another project if I didn’t have these other projects and tight deadlines. However, if it is important and urgent then let’s discuss which project we can delay.
•  My schedule is full with our agreed upon project plans (and possibly other projects you have in the works). Anything additional, we need to discuss and then decide on a new plan and a new schedule (don’t forget additional costs).
•  Let me check my schedule and get back to you.

This last response I highly suggest you learn to say automatically, every time someone asks something of you. Even if you know your schedule will allow it; it helps to create the habit.  If you always refer to your schedule, it will give you time to think about the workload you currently have, and to check your emotional energy level as well. It will allow you to rationally decide what is best for you, and then give you time to manage your response.

Now, go take charge of your time and emotional energy so you can relax more and enjoy your life!

Christene Cronin

Christene Cronin is Director of Communications for Measure Marketing Results Inc. and Stryd-e; she is an enthusiastic and outgoing professional with extensive business experience (22 years) in the Technology industry. Her background in management and leadership roles provided her the opportunities to hone her communication skills and resilience to adversity. She has worked with entrepreneurs, and small to mid-size business owners helping them build and grow their business.